When Rules Are Challenged By Human Nature

Rules are meant to be broken?

Rules are organizational devices created by people, usually in the past, to control human behavior to support their goals. — Unknown

First of all, let’s play a game, but you MUST follow few very simple steps: place your right hand over your heart, close your eyes, take a real deep breath, then ask yourself, “Have you ever bent or broken any rules?”

Okay now, I suppose the question above did flash through your mind for a moment, yet the interesting part is, how many of the readers actually follow the “game rule” as stated? For those who really follow, I appreciate your sincerity in reading my blog; for those who don’t, gotcha! You’ve just been the subject of this topic.

Just a little joke made but I daresay, all of us break rules, minor or major, intentionally or not. … Some rules are valid and must be enforced in order to hold people within the ethical boundaries. Some rules are simply stupid just like the game rule above (another good place to find plenty of stupid rules is MMU). But, is it wrong to break rules? Not necessary. So long one is willing to accept the consequences of his action; so long his action does not harm the others. Well, IMHO, it is fine to break rules. The existence of rules is merely impossible to be the best of both worlds. While the rules are created to support certain party’s goals, they are broken for the interests of the other party.

One night I was chatting with a friend regarding the blog assignment rules, she told me that a lot of students actually fail to meet the requirement by posting once a week (ermm that includes me). Well she makes a good role model who really posts once a week punctually (exactly a gap of 7 days), and she has got 8 posts currently. She questioned why can’t people just follow what is required to. That’s a good question that inspires me to write about the rebellious nature of human beings.

Humans are born rebellious

Humans are inherent with rebellious nature. I believe all of us have experienced it in ourselves and have observed it in others. Take speeding. If the speed limit on the highways is 55 mph, people are not generally satisfied until they are driving 60. One would surely think that such people would be exceptionally content to drive at 70, and indeed they will, until the speed limit is moved to 70, then happiness will not be found at any speed less than 75. It seems that there is no contentment in perfect compliance with the law.

Such nature is especially observable in children and teenagers. Tell a child not to open a particular drawer, even though the child may not have prior intention to do so, temptation to open the drawer arises naturally once the command is given. Does it sound familiar to you? Since we were young, we have been warned and commanded many times about the “don’ts”, “can’t”, “musts”, “wrongs” and etc.. They act like constraints to our freedom in life. At times we are whispering within ourselves, “Why can’t I do this?”, “Why must I do that?”, “What if… I don’t?”. More questions arise as we grow up, have gained autonomy and developed our own world model. We have learned reasoning, and we make our rebellious behavior more reasonable.

At times we are risking ourselves on the borderline between do and don’t, right and wrong, even though we are aware of the potential dangers behind. That’s the beauty of temptation. It is always the discontentment of human beings that leads us to the struggle between our ethics awareness and our rebellious nature. In the end, we either manage to hold our curiosity and desire back, or indulge ourselves in them, which probably let ourselves be consumed by regret and guilt later.

Pain-induced Aggression: When Anger Intrudes

Ever attacked or chased by a dog when you inadvertently stepped on its paw or tail?

Alright if the case is not that cartoonish, how about…

Ever bitten by your lovely pet dog when you tried to touch it when it was injured? How you reacted? Beat it for misbehaving? And end up its teeth sank even deeper into your flesh? Did you try to understand why it behaved in this way? Why it suddenly turned from an adorable puppy into an aggressive beast?

Yes, it is because of the pain. Such behavior is termed as pain-induced aggression – an instinctive defense reaction of animals to attack the cause of pain.

Likewise, primates like humans do possess such instinct to defend themselves from harms. Here it is more about the psychology of anger. Of course we do not bite when we are provoked or hurt, we are not barbarians. Normally we retaliate in a more civilized way – a verbal counterattack, which may further lead to a physical fight, when tension soars.

From the psychological perspective, anger is a natural and mostly automatic response to pain. It is a kind of aggression results as a psychological defense against threats, hurts and losses, which I call soul’s injuries. The type of pain does not matter. The point is that the pain experienced is certainly unpleasant. As anger never occurs in isolation, i.e. one does not get angry for no reason. There must always be some pain feelings precede, followed by some negative thoughts that trigger anger. Therefore anger is often characterized as a by-product emotion.

From the primitive biological perspective, anger is accompanied by arousal of the nervous system, which the secretion of hormones like adrenaline produces effects throughout the body such as the pupils dilate, the heart pounds, the respiration and blood pressure increase. This phenomenon is better known as the fight-or-flight response, when one is provoked or hurt. In such situation one either chooses to transform the feelings of pain into anger, to defend himself by retaliating against the target that causes the pain; or to avoid and leave, in pain. The latter often results one in misery, who suffers the pain alone.

Sometimes you may wonder: “What on Earth makes him so pissed off with my words? I was just saying… “, well think again. You might have inadvertently touched his wound lying secretly under his soul. When someone loses his temper, when someone is throwing tantrum at you, bear with him, for he is feeling pain. He needs to be understood and accepted. To ease his pain, you may apply the “Taijiquan” philosophy – to conquer hardness with softness. Try to understand the cause of his pain and show your sincere concern and care, that would resolve the tension quicker. When his emotion is calmed after feeling understood and accepted, he would probably regret his misbehavior a moment ago.

Lastly, not forgetting about yourself. Sometimes you do feel angry of someone or something don’t you? When you become the sensitive, easily irritated out-of-control one, you should realize that it is very likely because you were once injured, and the wound has not healed yet. It is your animal instinct to defend yourself from the cause of pain. If you are able to figure out your own wounds, then you will be able to cure them more effectively and hence become a better person, with well-managed emotion.

Quoted from Romans 12:20

“But if your enemy is hungry, feed him, and if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.”